“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the
Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our
affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction
with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God” (2 Cor. 1:3-4,
KJV).
Empathy, the ability to walk in another person’s shoes, is usually
preceded by compassion. Empathy allows you the ability to really imagine how another
in that situation must be feeling; even if you haven’t experienced the exact
same events as the person who is suffering.
Many have never experienced the challenges of living with a
mental illness. However the Biblical account of Jesus’ encounter with the
Gadarene demoniac in the Book of Mark, Chapter 5, gives a very good glimpse of
the life experiences still experienced even today by those who are experiencing
untreated or undertreated mental illness:
(1). Mark 5:3- “Who
had his dwelling among the tombs; and no man could bind him, no, not with
chains” (KJV).
Estrangement from Family and Community
There are those who never had a good support system to
assist them during the times when their mental illnesses are so pronounced.
Others lost their primary supports due to death or, usually, parents or
grandparents, became too medically fragile to care for them. There are many
with mental illnesses however, who due to their illnesses and/or behaviors,
simply taxed their loved ones so heavily over a period of time that they found
themselves severed from family, friends and other meaningful supports.
Imagine how different your life would be if you lost all
contact with those you loved such as parents, siblings, spouses and even your
own children due to a medical condition that distorted your mood, your thoughts
and your feelings. Imagine the emotional disconnect that you would feel if your
loved ones didn’t recognize your need for treatment but were harsh, critical
and told you that you were not welcomed around them because you are just “weak”
and “need to suck it up.”
Can you imagine living in a community in which your illness
skews your reality so far apart from the realities of everyone else around you causing
you to be publicly ridiculed or the butt of cruel jokes? Worst yet, because of
your illness, you are the target of violence. Imagine how confusing it would be
to find yourself being assaulted and robbed by those who, only the day before
your check day, had been your “friends.” Maybe you are a female who is sexually
assaulted within the community or by staff in hospitals, group homes, etc., but
no one believes you because of your mental status.
(2). Mark 5:4- “Because
that he had been often bound with fetters and chains, and the chains had been
plucked in pieces: neither could any man tame him” (KJV).
Repeated Failed Interventions
There are many experiencing mental illness who don’t receive
the help they need to effectively manage their symptoms due to lack of
insurance, limited insurance, the stigma of mental illness and family members
who utilize inappropriate interventions. There are many others who have sought
help only to be labeled as “non-compliant” when they have resisted involuntary
hospitalizations or medications that caused severe side effects or affected
them in a physical manner.
Even if your thinking is distorted, how trusting would you
remain if someone took you somewhere under the guise of getting you out of the
cold only to have several strong men grab you, put you in restraints and strap
you to a bed for hours or isolate you in a small room after giving you some
type of injection with little or no explanation? Chances are these experiences
probably would not have to occur too many times before the average individual
would become combative and resistant about being restrained.
(3). Mark 5:5- “And
always, night and day, he was in the mountains, and in the tombs, crying, and
cutting himself with stones” (KJV).
It probably goes without saying that individuals
experiencing severe depression, delusions, auditory and visual hallucinations
and other symptoms of mental illness often experience extreme psychological and
emotional distress. Imagine being unable to rely on your own mind, thoughts and
feelings to relay accurate information regarding your environment and those
around you. That can be very terrifying as well as frustrating. Yet, contrary
to popular misconceptions, most of those who are mentally ill are more likely
to harm themselves than to harm others. According to the National Alliance on
Mental Illness (NAMI), approximately 30,000 deaths occur annually in the United States
due to suicide and close to 1 million Americans receive treatment for suicidal
thoughts, behaviors or attempts on a yearly basis.
While 1 in 4 adults in the U.S. are diagnosed with a mental
illness, many of us will never experience these exact experiences. Nevertheless,
because we each share the human experience with our own challenges to overcome,
we are all very aware of the importance of giving and receiving the comfort and
compassion of others.
Can it be a long process when dealing with someone who is
mentally ill? Yes. Is it possible that you will become frustrated when you see
little or no progress while working with someone experiencing a mental illness?
Again, yes. However, before you throw in the towel or come to the conclusion
that these individuals are unworthy or beyond your compassion, take a moment,
exhale, regroup and take a moment to imagine what it is like and also what it
really means to walk a mile in that individual’s shoes.
© 2015 Linda Haywood. All rights reserved worldwide.
